Sunday, July 09, 2006 hmmm.....time flies its been a months time since NS life had started...been in that place for quite sometime guess its quite use to some of the things in there ba...but things like slping is alway not in my dictionary in there.....maybe cause i dont realli practice slping early ba.....life in there is the same..wonder wats in there...hmmm some treat it fun cause its fun everyday learning something new for some inside is just a place to slack i guess...thats life in there, for me inside is just about going to the office doing office work most of the time thats all ba i guess nth much waiting to get post out...some would ask me wheather i wan to get post out...i dont know maybe maybe not ba...i guess inside life still fine my friends my sergent all treat me not bad lo.....Nothing for me to do at time nth for me to practice as well so sometimes it can quite boring ba.....hmm Had been out recently...
Cant see the world outside clearly...the paste of things thats changing in a rate where i dont know where i stand where i belong i dont belong to the inside tekong world i dont belong to the world outside tekong as well....hmm....seem that everythings around had change so much...friends....people....situations..... everything just i would say in a mess or something.Maybe its not in a mess ba its just me thats in a mess....my life......Dont wann know hows everyone doing le....wo lei le....i think i m just been paronid at time ba.......i wann be a selfish to just keep in this shell....Just dont wann care hows ppl doing caring sometimes just make me seems so irriating moreover just cannot do anything just pissing everyone off......take all your problems with yourself ba....i dont care....Sometimes just make me fucking miserable knowing all thats happening....maybe i busybody or wat ba...maybe i shouldnt in the 1st place give a fucking damm about anything....life is just never fair about things...The more you cared the more things aint right...
Looking outside its just raining so damm big everythings just seems like wat my heart is feeling now full of water....dropping and dropping...hmm i m unhappy....ya super fucking unhappy......even blogging all this i just dont know wats more...i might seems abit selfish...but thats all i know for knowing the world.... knowing everyone in my life...Its realli not worth it to be good.....just take an example a jerk can alway be a jerk but if he changes to be good everyone will be happy for him n all but for someone who is nice once he make a mistakes he'll be condem by everyone...is this fair.....Dont know the world seems to be more n more complicated.....thinking about all this i have blog i dont know reali it make sense to anyone of you anot but i felt this for quite long.........tired about all thats happening everyone is so damm bloody selfish wann die n all running away n all....fuck it man.......i just dont seems to get anything in my mind......maybe its block maybe its stuck....maybe i m still inmature.....i rather be that way.....Anyway all of you got ppl that care...all of you got ppl that you can talk to n all so ya......just wan fuck off this very moment le.....freaking tired of just thinking for all......fucking stupid thinking...jerking off.....
Some of you might be thinking what the fuck is wrong with this guy sia......I can just say i dont own anyone of you a fucking explaination.........Dont need to explain anything.....just feel so empty...listening to songs looking at my com looking out the window.I not complaining anything just dont know wat i m thinking losing myself bit by bit each freaking day...Time to do abit of self reflection maybe..Tired le..fucking sian fucking sad fucking stonned......Just dont wann anything le not even my life....Sry to those i've irriated i've pissed i've scolded.....-tEaReD-
